Originally published by: OCPD Online

THE THIRTEEN VIRTUES

Welcome to the Benjamin Franklin Monthly Self-Improvement Through Self-Examination Challenge, or the BFMSITSEC for short. I know it rolls right off of the tongue, however, maybe the Ben Franklin Challenge is a more befitting name. Let's go ahead and stick with that for the time being and if you have a better suggestion, you can let us know.

Benjamin Franklin is widely regarded to have been one of the most prolific men in history. In a NYT bestseller 'Benjamin Franklin: An American Life, Walter Isaacson writes "He was the most accomplished American of his age and the most influential in inventing the type of society America would become". And that's great and all, but of all people past and present, what could Benjamin Franklin possibly offer to those of us with obsessive compulsive personalty disorder? In a word, methodology. You see, the thing about healing or treating or combatting, is that it requires a plan.

I'm not writing this article as a health care professional, but neither am I writing it from an outsider's perspective. I suffer with a personality disorder. I have fought this disorder for the better part of ten years and I've always had to fight the disorder on its own terms. And what choice do I have? I can't separate myself from my personality and this disorder seeks to create constant noise and chaos our minds. Every plan I devise is fraught with pitfalls and traps that my mind doesn't allow me to see coming. And during all of this time, there have been persistent patterns that have caused me to make very little progress.

When analyzing the futility of each failed plan, I took note of which particular thought patterns seemed to be getting in the way of success. There were two that came up each time. Due to my need for control, I would foolishly attempt to work on the personality as a whole. As it's a maladaptive personality that is causing all of my problems, I believed that I had to change everything at once or else I wasn't making any real progress. The second thing I did was to focus where I was failing. I wouldn't remember the five times throughout the day I was able to recognize a thought as being intrusive and instead I would fret over my inability to resist washing my hands that one extra time.

And so I needed a fresh perspective. Which brings us back to Ben. One of Franklin's lesser known projects (and one of his more loftier pursuits) was that of attaining moral perfection. We probably think of morality as a set of beliefs in which we lay out the differences between right and wrong. And although Mr. Franklin would have thought of morality much the same way in a broad context, his morality involved behaving in a way that resulted in a balanced life. He believed the key to a happier, fuller and more meaningful life was through self-examination and improvement. And though he (spoiler alert) never attained 'moral perfection' he “was (by trying) a better and happier man than I otherwise should have been”.

"My intention being to acquire the habitude of all these virtues, I judg'd it would be well not to distract my attention by attempting the whole at once, but to fix it on one of them at a time; and, when I should be master of that, then to proceed to another, and so on, till I should have gone thro' the thirteen; and, as the previous acquisition of some might facilitate the acquisition of certain others, I arrang'd them with that view, as they stand above.”

-Benjamin Franklin from 'The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin'

Now down to the nitty gritty. I needed a plan and B.F. had one. What is this plan exactly, and how can we reap the benefits? What Benjamin did was to choose thirteen virtues he believed "necessary or desirable" in his quest for moral perfection. Thirteen were chosen because he could cycle through the virtues a total of four times during a calendar year and arrive at an even fifty two weeks. In his intention to acquire each of these thirteen virtues he decided to "fix it on one of them at a time", and this really is the key to the whole process. He created a chart listing out the specific thirteen virtues, with each of the seven days of the week written below them. Each week his goal would be to avoid offense of the single virtue whose turn it was upon the sheet. He didn't choose the order randomly, but rather selected a virtue, that having mastered, would be helpful in tackling the following week’s virtue.

The final component to this founding father's endeavor would be accountability. In the simplest of terms his goal was to work on one virtue per week and leave the remaining twelve to "ordinary chance". He kept an ivory leafed memorandum book on which the lines were drawn with a permanent red ink, and and on those lines he would mark his faults with a black pencil that could be wiped away each successive week. He would track all of the "faults of the day”, however he was determined to only give strict attention to the virtue belonging to that week. It was the practice of this process throughout his entire life (well a good chunk of it for that matter) that put him on a path of self-reflection and self-improvement.

Fast forward to today, and what can you and I can glean from this wonderful example of betterment and reformation? Well whether you have OCPD or not, this practice of identifying those components of our personalty that could use modifying, and then singling them out for improvement, is hugely beneficial. When attempting to correct our OCPD maladaptive behaviors, it's easy, common & even likely we will allow ourselves to become overwhelmed. We demand perfection from ourselves, and in doing so, set ourselves up for failure every single time. This method of only focusing on one per week has the potential to free up the mental space needed to actually make some forward progress.

So I'm a few months into a revised version of BF's plan, and not only am I seeing genuine change, but I'm finding the process straightforward and at times even enjoyable. Which brings me to the point of this entire article. I've brazenly made some tweaks to the original structure of the plan, while retaining all of the original spirit. After reading up on the thirteen virtues, I felt strongly that I could take this technique and use it to adjust stubborn OCPD behaviors. I wasn’t expecting a miracle, but as all of you with OCPD know, even a 5% improvement can be something worth celebrating. And that's what's happened. I've made very slow but also very measurable changes in how I approach my thoughts and behaviors. What I'd like to do at this point is to share with you my modified program. To put it bluntly, I'd like to challenge you to join me in this endeavor. I've gone ahead and done all the heavy lifting for you by creating a downloadable worksheet that's primed and ready to go. The worksheet is available to download towards the bottom of this article. I've also gone ahead and included my own personal worksheet, to both demonstrate how best to use the worksheet and to share with you the 'virtues' I've chosen to focus on over the coming year.

All that's left now is to set you up with some basic instructions and to send you on your merry way. The first thing I've gone ahead and done is to replace the virtues with symptoms you’re struggling with (i.e. the top traits that you can self-identify as causing you the most amount of complications and anxiety). And to make things easier on us, I've reduced the number from thirteen down to four. This is both in an attempt not to overwhelm you, and to increase the frequency with which we come back to each trait (also I get to call it the 'monthly challenge’ instead of the 'three and a quarter month challenge'). Now you are welcome to leave it just there. You can work on one symptom per week. Put an 'X' in the box when you miss the mark during the day, and enjoy seeing the number of 'X's reduce over time. But it seems to me that if we leave it there, we're missing the challenge component completely.

"It is a grand mistake to think of being great without goodness and I pronounce it as certain that there was never a truly great man that was not at the same time truly virtuous.”

-Benjamin Franklin

Now I'm going to ask that you enter into this final paragraph with extreme caution, and the reason is this: This challenge is not intended to increase stress or anxiety. It is not intended to increase list making. It is not intended to morph one set of symptoms into an entirely new set of symptoms. And most importantly, it is not an excuse to punish yourself for failing to meet your own perfect standards. With that said, I've added a final modification to the program. I’ve given you the option to include a behavioral correction tactic or to implement a reward system. To use myself as an example, if I'm not punctual for a reason that was preventable (during my punctual week) I will set my morning alarm clock earlier for the following day. It's something small, but it's also something I'd like to avoid doing. However, and this is a big however, I know the tendency for us with OCPD is to beat ourselves up over our failings or perceived failings. The point of having this minor penalty system is to have a way in which to hold ourselves accountable that does not include feeling guilty, wasting time dwelling on the negative, or punishing ourselves via mental torture. If you are unable to do this without negative emotional consequences, then go the complete opposite direction and reward yourself for those days that you finish with no 'X's. We are trying to break these cyclical downward spirals, not trigger further ones. So please, please, please remember that you are to hold yourself accountable only if you are able to do so without guilt or sadness. This entire system is an exercise in mindfulness, and to treat it as anything other than that is to lose the point entirely. Treat yourself with kindness throughout this entire process. I'll finish by reminding you, as I did in the beginning, that I'm not a mental health professional. These are techniques that I've found beneficial for treating my OCPD symptoms and I believe them to be worthy of your time. If you choose to accept this challenge please understand that this program works best when you treat it lightly. I believe in you. I'd say best of luck, but all you really need is a little determination.

Benjamin Franklin’s 13 Virtues

1. Temperence: Eat not to dullness. Drink not to elevation.

2. Silence: Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself. Avoid trifling conversation.

3. Order: Let all your things have their places. Let each part of your business have its time.

4. Resolution: Resolve to perform what you ought. Perform without fail what you resolve.

5. Frugality: Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.

6. Industry: Lose no time. Be always employed in something useful. Cut off all unnecessary actions.

7. Sincerity: Use no hurtful deceit. Think innocently and justly; and if you speak, speak accordingly.

8. Justice: Wrong none by doing injuries or omitting the benefits that are your duty.

9. Moderation: Avoid extremes. Forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.

10. Cleanliness: Tolerate no uncleanness in body, clothes, or habitation.

11. Tranquility: Be not disturbed at trifles or at accidents common or unavoidable.

12. Chastity: Rarely use venery but for health or offspring - never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another's peace or reputation.

13. Humility: Imitate Jesus and Socrates.